Zombie Apologetic


No, not the ¨I´m sorry¨ kind of apologetic. This is more of the old-school, rational (ish) argument in favor of something kind of apologetic.

I think Zombies are kind of hilarious, and I´m not sorry about it.

Before you summon a spirit or anything, let me be more specific…I may be may be using the old meaning of apologetic, but I´m definitely talking about the modern viral epidemic version of Zombies. I don´t mean to imply anything about Haitian Mythology, or Voodoo, or anything of the sort. I don´t know a thing about it and would never presume to comment.

I´m talking about modern ¨Night of the Living Dead¨ ¨Dawn of the Dead¨ ¨Walking Dead¨ kind of dead.  I live in Western Pennsylvania. We likes us some zombies around here. My first apartment was short shamble from the graveyard where they filmed ¨Night of the Living Dead” (Shout out to Butler and Evans City.) As we speak, I´m sitting 15 miles from the mall where they filmed of ¨Dawn of the Dead.¨ My husband and I have been binge-watching ¨The Walking Dead¨ to get caught up to the current season. You know, THOSE zombies.

That influence, combined with the wonderful, enlightening conversations we have onMenage A Tarot podcast together inspired the original ¨Zombie Cat¨ posts on Modern Oracle .com which in turn led to the whole idea of ¨Zombie Cat´s Crazy Crap Predictions¨ as a Tarot reading.

So why combine zombies, cats, and ¨predicting¨ the future? It´s probably heading for trouble to ask people to see the philosophical side of zombies just like it has been a challenge trying to get some people to realize that Tarot can not predict the future – or if they will get back together with their ex. A prediction that does any real good is as rare and improbable as a zombie cat coming out of Shrodinger´s famous experiment.

Yet, paradoxically, zombies and tongue-in-cheek predictions are a load of fun if you don´t take them too seriously. If zombies can be fun, so can predictions. Thus ¨Zombie Cat´s Crazy Crap Predictions¨ yes-or-no Tarot readings.

I´ve been asked if Zombie Cat is mean or angry. Nope. Not at all. I can see where you could get that idea, especially if you have watched old mummy horror films…zombie mummies always seem seriously cranky and were out to GET you. But when you look at the recent zombie Apocalypse genre, it is less about the zombies and more about the Apocalypse. You could substitute any  life-threatening swarm and get the same basic story arc: Aliens, killer bees, land Paranha on steroids….same difference. I kind of feel for the zombies. Especially first thing in the morning before that first cup of coffee. Modern zombies aren´t the minions of evil, but usually the victims of biology.  It´s not their fault they woke up one day all dead and hungry for human flesh. Modern zombies have about the same murderous, plotting, evil  agenda of a shark who takes a bite out of surfer that shows up in the shark´s living room one morning flopping around and looking like a tasty breakfast seal.

You can get all philosophical about zombies, how they can symbolize our fear of death, or our own mortality. They can be serious art. Or at least serious pop art. Tarot is serious too, and I take the role of ¨healer with words¨ to heart when it comes to Modern Oracle readings. I whole-heartedly believe that Tarot can ease stress, help heal emotional hurts, lift spirits, and show creative ways through complex problems. If you want a Tarot reading elevated in that way, please visit me over at Modern Oracle.

If, on the other hand, you want a different kind of lift, a reading that eases up on the ponderous, gives you a bowl full of fluff with a sprinkle of snark, a swirl of tough love on top and nuggets of advice and wisdom underneath…then it´s time to talk to Zombie Cat.

meet Zobie Cat here

order a reading here

“Zombie Cat’s Crazy Crap Predictions” are 3 card Tarot readings that answer one yes-or-no question. With a focus on fun but an open door to guidance these readings have a 50% chance of being dead wrong, a 75% chance of bringing a smile, and 100% chance of provoking one thought or another.

entertainment only


If one of my readings can make someone laugh and feel lighter (the way I feel watching this Bad Lip Reading video) then I am one happy Zombie Cat!